Happy New Year

As we approach the New Year I look back on how far I’ve come. How much I have to be happy for. If I had been told 6 or 7 years ago that I would be married (to a gorgeous man) and have a beautiful (sorry Honey, Handsome) baby, I would have said “ya right! I’m going to be a crazy old cat lady and like it!” Even though my deepest desire was to be a mom.

Growing up I felt unworthy of any boy’s attention. Despite the fact that I was usually someone’s chosen “mommy” in our childhood games of “house”. I always had a crush that I would be too shy to even talk to. Oh, I had plenty of guy friends, but the moment I thought of any of them as potential love interests I would clam up and be too nervous to be around them.

As I got older and had a “best friend” who fed off negative energy (you know – the emotional vampire. I’m sure everyone knows at least one. They aren’t as sexy and charming as Edward from Twilight. No sparkles here!) these feelings of self doubt did not go away but grew. Amazing what the spoken word can do to someone. Being told that you are not worthy everyday, and you deem yourself not worthy.

If I had a crush and told my friend she would respond in one of two ways. Either “Oh he likes me not you. Can’t you see it?” or if the crush showed an ounce of interest in me “He’s just going to use you for sex!”

I put up with this for more than a decade, despite my family’s urging me to stay away from this vampire. Finally, after a fight over work with her mom and my mom I broke off this relationship for good. Good riddance to bad rubbish!

Quite amazingly my confidence began to grow. I now saw myself as beautiful, smart and worthy of whatever I wanted out of life.

I blame my friendship with this girl and my subsequent low self-esteem for the fact that I was left with very few friends. I was lonely.

It hadn’t initially occurred to me to use a dating website but upon looking for activities online that might help me meet people I stumbled upon Plenty of Fish. It’s free so I gave it a whirl.

I met a guy almost right away. A few actually but I thought I might want to weed out the biker looking dude (although he might have been a better choice).

I sound shallow, but I lowered my standards in the looks department and decided Mr. Rock was a good choice and agreed to meet him in person. He seemed smart, funny, kind and he liked cats. He was undecided about kids.

We dated for almost a year when I finally let myself see the truth. Mr. Rock was bad in bed. Mr. Rock never introduced me as his girlfriend. Never introduced me to his mom (though I met his dad by coincidence). Though he had a cat that passed away just before we met, he did not want another. And most daunting for me Mr. Rock did not want a wife or child! I think he just liked having a younger (by ten years) woman in his bed even if he didn’t seem to brag about it. I dumped him.

And strange as it may sound dumping him gave me a huge confidence boost. I don’t have to put up with what I don’t want!

I did feel a little guilty that I wasn’t that upset about the break-up. I asked my mom if she thought it was okay if I went back on the dating site. She said if I felt ready I should go for it. And I did.

I went back reassuring myself that being married and a mom would be nice but wouldn’t be imperative to a happy life for me. I could enjoy being the crazy cat lady and have as many cats as I want!! I think knowing this and truly feeling this way in my heart lead me to meeting the man of my dreams.

Within about a week we met for our first date. It sounds cheesy, most especially to you dear readers, but we both agree it was love at first site. I was hesitant for a short while that something bad would happen. That one day I would realize he wasn’t who he pretended to be. But thankfully, I worried for nothing. I learned that we are a lot alike. What you see is what you get. No mind games.

We’ve been together for almost four years. Married for a year and a half with a beautiful (handsome) healthy baby boy. And we have four cats. (After telling Hubby the story of Mr. Rock he now refers to us happily as the crazy cat couple).

I used to get depressed around this time of year. I thought I would never find someone to share my life with. My mom always reassured me “For every Jill there’s a Jack”.

This year I have it all. I feel so blessed. It’s a wonderful (life) year! A family of my own!

Seven Weeks (and two days)

Little D slept thru the night. When I woke up this morning I had to think hard - did I get up last night? (I hadn't had my coffee yet!)

He is more alert for longer periods now. I am coming to appreciate his play mat that his Gramma gave him (an early Christmas present). He is now batting his hands at the hanging toys and amusing himself. Sure it's fun to play with a baby, but it can also be very tiring!

And the smiles just keep coming! Especially if either Hubby or I have been at work for a few hours. Upon our arrival home Little D will greet us with the most beautiful smile I have ever seen.

His whole being makes the swollen ankles, morning sickness and scary c-section (almost) vanish from my memory.

Santa Visit

Daniel met Santa for the first time yesterday. Of course he slept through the whole visit.

It's Almost Christmas!!!

and Little D has had enough of the Christmas photos already!

Mommy Brain

Way back when Little D was just a few days old (it does seem like ages ago) I had taken him to the store with me. When I gave the cashier the wrong change she said it was because I suffered from mommy brain. And then reassured me that my brain would go back to normal in about fifteen years. :0

Today I use mommy brain as an excuse for not having taken any pictures… Yesterday the three of us went to Baba’s house for dinner. Little D’s other Great Grandma was up for a visit. The family (our end of the family, that is!) doesn’t get together very often so it was nice to have the opportunity. We all had a very nice dinner. My Uncle and his lovely wife took lots of photos (thank goodness), but for some reason I didn’t think to take any of my own. Duh!

So I am waiting for an email full of lovely pictures… (hint hint!!)

Hoping mommy brain doesn’t take over too much or I might forget my own name. It’s Mommy, right?

File it under strange or lucky?

Due to the work being done at Baba's I've been gathering the rest of my stuff to take home with me. Yesterday I brought home the little cabinet that my dad made a few years back. I had been trying to figure out the best place for it and decided the kitchen could use some spiffing up. I moved the cork board. There were two screws in the wall already. On a whim I tried the cabinet on them and ta-da!!! I couldn't believe it! Guess it was meant to be.

Almost Five Weeks

Little D is doing well in his own bedroom at night. Yesterday he practically demanded to have a nap in his own bed. He kept crying and nothing would soothe him until Daddy finally put him down in his bed. Three cheers for Daddy!

I am amazed at how fast time is going by and how fast he is growing. Although I am looking forward to getting to know Little D as he learns to talk and walk I know I will miss him in this baby stage (I guess that’s how people end up with siblings).

I have been sorting through his clothes every other week, putting aside all the little outfits that don’t fit him anymore. I am stunned by how small some of those onsies are. He used to fit into that not too long ago.

I am currently working on getting a cute picture of D's big feet. This is the cutiest so far...still working on it!

The Chandler

Are you familiar with the Friends episode when Chandler and Monica are trying to get their engagement picture taken and Chandler keeps making weird faces for the camera. Well my mom is normally like that. As soon as a camera comes close to her she freezes up and then ends up hating all pictures taken or her.

I have found a cure for her. A grandson!

One Month Old

Time is flying. Our little guy is now one month old.
It is one of those situations where time goes by fast and slow at the same time. The fact that our little guy is growing so fast is amazing. At 2am when he doesn’t want to sleep, the clock seems to stand still as I try to convince him that mommy needs some shut eye.

Just the other day we had dinner at my mother-in-laws and she commented that he “doesn’t have that infant look anymore. He looks like a baby now.” That’s because he got his mommy’s big head. (A lot of the hats I have for him do not fit and he hasn’t even worn them yet!)

Last night was the first night that Baby slept in his own room. I resisted my urge to go to him every time he made a noise. For the most part I think things went well.

Hubby and I are starting to sound like those parents I used to make fun of. I find myself (half joking mind you) saying that our baby is advancing faster than other babies. He could practically lift his own head right from birth! Okay, maybe not that fast, but his neck muscles are pretty strong for only four weeks.

His coos and gurgles make me fall in love with him over and over again. Oh and that killer smile (or IS it gas?) has my heart skipping a beat.
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About a week ago we received a bill from the hospital. I was confused. We don’t have insurance, just OHIP. I asked to be on a ward because that is covered. I know I was put in a semi-private room, however I figured I was there because I had heard the nurses say that the maternity ward was really busy.

So anyway, the bill was for $420. Not exactly chump change – especially for new parents. So hubby called and the person in billing said that I had signed for it and that was that. He tried to argue that IF I did sign for it, I had just gotten out of surgery and was still drugged up. Nothing they could do about it.

My gung-ho Mother-in-law heard about this and decided to investigate further on our behalf. MIL got them to fax her a copy of this form I supposedly signed. HA! Not my signature!! Someone messed up big time. I am relieved because the thought of taking a hospital to court didn’t sound so easy to me. I thank God for my mother-in-law.

I do wonder if they will be able to get payment from the person that did sign the form?!

New Banner

I finally got my new banner finished and posted. Trying to catch up on lots of stuff while recovering from the c-section and this stubborn cold.
Hoping to write more soon.


My little elf!

Numb, Scared and Ripped Apart

I remember telling several medical personnel that I have a right pelvic kidney. It works, it’s just in the wrong place. The Doctor said this would not effect the procedure.

So I was rolled into the operating room. The anaesthesiologist explained my options. I just said yes. I was scared.

I began to panic when it felt like the operation was starting and hubby wasn’t with me. Finally he was holding my hand. I felt pressure and tugging. It felt like the baby was suctioned in my belly. I could almost hear an audible “pop” as they pulled him out. I remember thinking “Nothing else has gone according to the plan. He’s going to end up being a girl and I have nothing for her to wear.”

Then he was out. The doctor confirmed that I had a little boy. Hubby told me to look behind him. The nurses were cleaning him up. “He looks like me!” I said.

(I am the baby in the black and white and my little boy is in colour)


As they removed the placenta I swear I could feel them moving my kidney. I became vocal about it – like these doctors don’t know what they are doing.

Hubby was able to hold the baby. As they finished with me, hubby and baby were carted away to a recovery room. I soon followed. Nurse Paula was with me again as the drugs wore off. I shook like crazy and was upset I couldn’t hold my baby. Hubby brought him over to me. Then I was carted off to my room where I remained from Friday to Sunday.

I hated being in the hospital and asked to be sent home a day early. I was originally supposed to be discharged on Monday.

This precious little creature is so worth it!

Mother Load

Hubby finally reappeared as the nurse prepared for baby’s arrival. He had driven an hour to pick up my mom and an hour back to the hospital. And though I was mad that he left me for so long I was so happy my mom was with me.

Eventually, I was told to push. I couldn’t feel my contractions so I really relied on hubby to tell me when they started (he could see the monitor). I had a hard time pushing in the right spot but eventually everyone could see the top of the baby’s head crowning. Yep! He was right there! But more pushing did nothing. Part of my cervix was holding him back and he was “sunny side up” as the nurse explained it. The doctor was called in to assess the situation. I was exhausted.

At first the vacuum was suggested for delivery. I was agreeing to anything. Lying in wait for 24 hours I just wanted it to be over. Then the dreaded words came. Baby’s heart rate had dropped and I should have a c-section. I was brave at first. “So much for a birth plan.” Everyone laughed. I joked with the nurse (nurse Paula is an amazing lady!). I apologized for ruining her vaginal delivery record. Then we all became quiet, waiting for O.R. to be prepped. I began to cry. Nurse Paula encouraged my tears. “It’s alright to cry.” But I tried to be brave.

Is this Baby Ever Gonna Come?

Hubby stayed with me at the hospital over night on a pull-out chair/bed. I kept waking up, noting that nothing was happening. I thought, “Damn this epidural is great! I don’t feel a thing.” I slept as advised to save my strength for labour.

By morning hubby was really restless. He needed to get out and though I can’t blame him I did feel abandoned. He told me he was going home to check the cats and eat. He’d be back in an hour.

I was 8 cm dilated and it was taking about 2 hours per cm at this point.

While hubby was gone, things started to progress and the nurse said we could try pushing soon. I was upset – hubby wasn’t back yet and he was taking longer than he said he would. I started thinking he was home enjoying himself – loving wife forgotten about. Or worse, he’d been in an accident and our baby would be fatherless. I started to cry.

And the birth plan went flying out the window

The nurses were given my birth plan upon my admission. I was aware that a birth plan could not be written in stone. Anything can happen (or in my case nothing could happen) and we'd have to go to plan B (the unplanned). So despite not wanting induction I was given some pills to start contraction and told to walk the hospital corridors. I did begin to experience some contractions. More like menstrual cramps, which were nothing compared to the cramps I had as a teenager. Is this it? Screw the epidural!

Back to the room for more monitoring. Baby still good. Dilation starting slowly, but no regularity to contractions. What the Hell!

Eventually Oxytocin was administered through my IV. (I've always been creeped out by IVs sticking out of people arms or hands. I hadn't ever had one myself until this point in my life. I had to distract myself from it. Always afraid I'm gonna rip it out by accident.)

It did look like the oxytocin was working. Contractions started to pick up. It's all kind of fuzzy but I was sent to a delivery room and continued to be monitored. The nurse suggested that I walk to get things moving. As soon as I stood up I got a doozy of a contraction and wanted my drugs now. Looking back I wish I hadn't started the drugs so soon. But I was scared and tired.

That night I was given my epidural. And so began my lying in bed for who knows how long!?

So It Began...

I left you all with the exciting announcement that my water broke at 2am October 22nd.

The night before as we watched Heroes on DVD the baby was kicking like crazy. I mean it looked like I was about to pop out an alien right through my stomach. Feet and hands pushing out all over the place I knew something was up.

Once my water broke and I woke up hubby with the exciting news, I called the hospital and was told to stay home and wait for contractions which should start by morning. I tried to go back to sleep after hubby and I changed the wet bedding. (My water really broke, not just a trickle.)

I was too excited to sleep so I paced the house hoping to encourage contractions. I googled like a mad woman, wondering where these darned contractions were! They were very mild and irregular. I did finally go back to bed and made sure the baby was still kicking.

At about 9:30 that morning I was in the shower and a small blood clot came out and I was alarmed. I called the hospital again and they told me to come in. Turns out it was just my mucus plug - perfectly normal. I was put on the fetal monitor for a bit, still no real contraction. I was sent home and instructed to go for a walk. Come back around 2pm.

Hubby and I went to the squirrel park, excited and nervous. I kept saying that too bad baby didn't wait a day. The 23rd is hubby's birthday. I was experiencing some contractions, but still nothing significant.

At 2pm we went back to the hospital despite the lack of contractions. I was beginning to wonder what the hell was going on. I had read that once the water broke it was important to monitor the baby by 12 or 24 hours in case of infection. The triage nurses did wonder why I came in when nothing was happening. I've never done this before - Give me a break!

To be continued...

It's Starting...ever so slowly

My water broke at around 2am this morning. I called triage and since I didn't have contractions was told to stay home rest, eat and walk around and make sure I feel the baby moving. Everything seems to be fine. Except that I've only gotten a few contractions. Nothing consistent!

I'm not sure how much longer I should wait. I did a google search, but some of those answers were stupid. One person suggested sex to bring on the contractions. One with broken waters is to do no such thing as it could cause infection.

So for now I am going to walk around the house. Hoping to bring on the contractions naturally. Then I'll call the triage again and ask them how long I should wait. I would like it to happen on its own. I've heard drug induced labour is intense.

Wish me luck...I'm so excited!!!

39 Weeks…We’re getting very near the end

All there is left to do is wait. I’m terrible at waiting. We see the doctor again on Wednesday; hopefully she will see more progress. Or hey, we get to skip the appointment and go straight to the hospital.

Really, I am hoping for the baby to be born this Friday – his daddy’s birthday!

38 and a half weeks…or 9 days to go (hopefully)

The last doctor appointment we went to was routine. Only this time she did an internal at my curious insistence. And I mean how often does a patient ask for an internal voluntarily?

The cervix is softening. The baby’s head is engaged. Everything is ready to go. So now I wait impatiently. Over-analyzing every twinge and cramp. Wondering if I’ve packed all the right stuff for my hospital stay. Should I carry my hospital bag with me at all times? How many diapers do I have to bring? What will it all be like? Will the baby look like me, or his daddy?

So much excitement and anticipation, I don’t know how much longer I can take it :)

38 Weeks and Puffy

Right now even my fingers are puffy!!!

Happy Thanksgiving Canada!

37 Weeks…Is it time yet?

Originally I had written a whole page about being in a bad mood. Blah! Rainy weather and being very pregnant got me there. But I am determined not to dwell on it – so the bummer post is scraped.

Today we go to the doctor – again! I understand the importance of checking my progress and the baby’s well being but I am truly getting sick of going. And my appointment isn’t until noon so I have to wait half the day to get it over with. Okay I’m complaining again! I will stop.

I have read that sometimes the doctor will check for effacement and dilation at these “near the end of pregnancy visits”. Not every doctor does though. I’m on the fence about having an internal at this point. I only want to know if there is some progress, if not then just let nature tell me when the time comes. But things don’t work that way do they? LOL

I have been getting more Braxton Hicks contractions, but nothing painful a.k.a real contractions : ) Once they pass, the little guy likes to kick me in the ribs a couple of times then he settles down.

I’ve been jumping between states of calm yet impatient urges of “let’s get the show on the road” to “Oh My God! I have to get this and that done before the baby comes!” I’m sure that’s normal. Please tell me I’m normal : )

After the appointment:

We arrived half an hour early. Yes, I actually got Hubby out the door early for once. Yipee! Someone was late for their appointment so we were seen right away. I love when the day just falls into place like that. Perhaps if we had shown up later, when our appointment was scheduled, the late person would have shown up too and made us have wait?

So everything looks good. The doctor seems to whip through our appointments, which is fine by me. Everything has been “normal” for the last 37 weeks by now there is no real concern for anything to go wrong. She did feel for the baby again and she said, “He’s way down there.” Good boy!

I asked about an internal and she said she would start that next visit. It would be so nice if things started rolling soon. I’m just so excited to be a mommy.

37 weeks pregnant

37 weeks pregnant
Originally uploaded by lovey_dovey9

So happy to say that I have gotten this far without gaining any pregnancy stretch marks. (None that I can see anyway - and I can't see much past the top of my belly) :-)

36 Week Doctor Visit

I am already getting tired of visiting my doctor so often. Yesterdays visit was good - except for the new parents in the waiting room who constantly "SSSSHHHHHHHed" their already content newborn constantly. The whole time I sat there waiting. "SSSHHHHHH"! I wanted to SSSHHHH them!!

Anyway, irritability aside, everything looks good. Baby's heart rate is good. My blood pressure - check. And the doctor checked to make sure the little guy's head was down and in position. Check!! I'm very happy about that. And quite amazed. I'd been trying to figure out what position he is in for the last couple of days and couldn't for the life of me figure out what I was feeling. It took her all of two seconds. Guess that's why she's the pro! Now let's hope he stays in position for the big day...when ever that is.

I've still made no predictions myself, but Hubby thinks I'll deliver on the 26th and baby will weigh 8lbs 12oz. Baba thinks the 26th or 27th. I'm hoping they are right. The sooner the better for this impatient mama!

Halloween would be a cool birthday. I do have two conflicts with that date though. 1. It's almost a week after my estimated due date - I do hate waiting. And 2. Baby's 2 year old cousin would have to share her birthday. I don't know how the kids would like that. Maybe they would be fine with it. Maybe they wouldn't want to share the attention?! Who knows!

I'm not sure if its just the dreary weather we've been having or the pregnancy hormones but I've been very miserable for the last couple of days. Snapping at dear hubby. Crying for no reason. Getting irritated by new parents shushing their newborns! I do hope it passes. This should be a time for joy!

36 Weeks…only 4 weeks left…am I ready for this?

The most common piece of advice I have been receiving lately is to get as much sleep as possible because once junior arrives sleep will be a luxury. I agree. I anticipate the feedings every two hours or so. The diaper changes all hours of the night. What ever else I’m not expecting, I’m half expecting :)

My problem seems to be that I am too excited/anxious about this whole baby/motherhood thing that I wake up for one of my many bathroom breaks in the middle of the night and start thinking about baby or child birth or even not working for a month (But yet I know motherhood – especially with a newborn will be work). So, I am lying awake in bed for about 2 hours with all these thoughts and wonders racing through my mind. No, I can’t seem to shut them off. Some of them I fuel out of excitement.

And forget sleeping in. Once my 7/7:30am bathroom break comes around I am out of bed and ready to start my day. Sorting the baby’s room. Washing his clothes. Packing and repacking his diaper bag for the hospital. Do I have everything? I hope so. My lists that are scattered around the house should help. LOL

I do manage to tire myself out sometimes by the afternoon. And have actually been napping – guilt free on the couch with at least one cat snuggling with me. I think they know something is up. Chichi has been especially sucky of late. Following me around. Calling me to bed if I’m not there by 9pm. The other two soon follow us to bed leaving little room for hubby.

Here is my most recent belly picture.



Hubby and I think I have dropped a bit. My boobs used to rest on top of my belly, but now it has lowered. We think/hope! The little guy is still moving around, but not as much as he was about a month ago. I have gotten a couple of predictions on my delivery date. I don’t have a prediction myself, just a couple of “these would be nice dates”. If he comes early (which I doubt) October 9th would be cool – John Lennon’s birthday. And of course the 23rd would be neat – hubby’s birthday.

So, do you think my baby has “dropped”? Any predictions?

Crazy Pregnancy Dream

I dreamed the other night that I had the baby. He was adorable and tiny and I kept changing lots of wet diapers. Then, even though I still had to support his head, he could talk. Quite clearly too. I can't remember what was said, and I'm sure it's not important.
While I dealt with all the diapers and a super intelligent talking newborn without a wonder, sharp pencils began appearing in his little hands and he was trying to stab me. I would remove the pencil, wondering where it came from, and another would appear. And with all this weirdness going on I wasn't weirded out or anxious at all. I just continued my motherly duties of diaper changes, and moving sharp objects out of reach.

The alarm clock awoke me shortly after the pencils began appearing - thankfully!!

35 Weeks

We went to the Doctor today. Everything looks good. The baby is still moving around a lot so I suppose his position at the moment isn't significant, though his head seems to be down. I'm pretty sure his feet spend a lot of time in my rib cage.

I am pretty sure that the receptionist mistook my weight either this visit or last. I'm positive I haven't gained 10lbs in two weeks!!! I'm sure I would have felt that type of gain and I'm sure I would have seen it!!! Whatever! I'm letting it slide.

Hubby asked about the flu shot on my behalf. This doctor seems to think its a good idea whether I'm pregnant or not. My regular GP told me a few years ago that he wouldn't recommend a flu shot for a young healthy adult, as he thinks it will make your immune system weak. Only young children and elderly people should get them. So, now I'm not sure what I want to do. In my mind I do sway in the anti-flu shot camp. Maybe I'm paranoid. Maybe I've watched X-Files too much.

The vaccines will not be available until the end of October. I might have already given birth by that time. But if I am still pregnant and with the Swine Flu still around it might be a good idea.

Truly, I'm not sure what to do. Maybe I should have another talk about it with my GP. We seem to think the same way. I may be more comfortable with his opinion.

What do you think of flu vaccines? Do you get vaccinated every year?

A Laugh at My Own Expence

I had forgotten how desperately I wanted a baby bump so early in pregnancy.

I had gotten heavier, but that's far from the bump I know and love now :) It's hardly a bump at all.

I admit the majority of my weight gain happened in the first 4 months, which is odd but not totally unheard of. I blame the Lick's chocolate milkshakes (one of the tasty things that would temporarily remove that metallic taste from my mouth).

I do remember that at 16 weeks I did start feeling the baby move around, which is early for a first pregnancy.

What I've been hearing is just so true - every pregnancy IS different. Which is a relief, but at the same time frustrating! How am I supposed to plan every detail out? LOL

34 Weeks…Baby Shower and Lack of Sleep

I am truly at the point where sleep is always welcome but I never stay there long. Every movement wakes me. Either turning over will trigger a body ache, usually my hip or the baby lands on my bladder and I must rush to the bathroom. And then of course, either my mind takes over making me think of things to do, or how exciting it will be once the baby is here OR hubby starts snoring really loud. I nudge him hoping he will turn over then I feel bad when he wakes up (but not too bad though).

This morning it was Hubby’s snoring as well as my thoughts. Only today is somewhat exciting and nerve inducing. My mom and Baba are throwing me a baby shower. The nerve inducing part is me just being me – social situations make me nervous, especially this one because I am the center of it. I am excited to see my guests. I get to see lots of family that I don’t see often.

And well of course to be honest I am looking forward to the gifts for baby. The cute little outfits. Who can resist baby shopping?

The Mall, Parking Spots and Grumpy Old Men

Hubby and I went to the mall today to buy The Beatles Rock Band game. It does rock!

Hubby thought that we could take advantage of one of the designated "Parent" parking spots. You know the ones designated for "parents with children"? Since I'm "with child" and waddling like a big goose with swollen ankles and sore feet, Hubby thought it only fair that we take this spot.

As I was heaving myself out of the passenger seat an older gentleman (I'm being nice -see!) is getting into his car, in the designated handicap spot beside me. I wonder why he is hesitating with his door, kind of swinging it opened and closed. Then he says in a slightly snarky voice "Where are your children?"

My hormones are in high gear lately. I could cry or yell without hesitation. He's lucky we just had a happy visit with the doctor (at which the little guy kicked while the doctor was checking his heart rate - so cute). I point to my belly and say "Right here!".

Hubby thought that was friendly enough and smiled at the guy. The older dude just grumble something incoherent at me and finally got in his car and went away. Boy did that piss me off.

I realize some people think I'm carrying small (the baby and me are growing well according to the doctor), but really the guy was just looking to give someone a hard time. Did I even turn around to check for his handicap permit? No (but Hubby did). Is this guy's life so boring or meaningless that he actually hesitates just driving to where ever the hell grumpy old men go after visiting the mall to give me a hard time? Is that why he visits the mall? To monitor the designated parking for fraudulent parents? I really do wish that some people would mind their own business.

It’s Like Christmas!

I’m normally the type of person who can sleep through anything. So now being THIS pregnant and waking up every time I turn over or have to pee (which is often) is very frustrating for me.

As I’ve been told, and I try to remind myself, it will prepare me for waking up all hours of the night to feed the baby. Maybe I’m just argumentative, but at least with the baby here I will have a greater purpose for waking up. Right now, I turn or go to the bathroom, then I cannot fall back to sleep because I am excited/anxious about the baby’s arrival.

I was like this at Christmas time when I was younger (not much younger, mind you!). Christmas morning I would be up at 3 or 4am – wide awake. Lucky for me “Santa” would leave me a really cool pile of gifts to unwrap in my stocking, which was left just outside my bedroom door. Once I had that taken care of I could go back to sleep for another couple of hours.

I wouldn’t try to wake my brother up until about 7am. He wouldn’t get up. I’m still not sure if he really wasn’t that excited or he was just trying to drive his little sister crazy!

Anyway, pregnancy is like Christmas for me. I can’t wait to see my present. The big difference is that there really is no definite date. Unlike Christmas, Baby may not arrive on the designated date. Actually, he most likely won’t arrive on his designated due date. Was my big brother just preparing me for this test of patience?

33 Weeks picture

Amazing what a little make-up can do.


We've also been practicing dressing the baby. Here is our top model.

33 Weeks Pregnant – Keeping Busy

We’ve been busy this past weekend. Hubby painted the baby’s room. I realized I’m not so good at supervising, because I decided I had to do some paint touch ups. I know I’m bad. I’ve gotten the lectures already. :-)

We started to replace the flooring. With this I’m a little better at the supervising part. I do allow myself to measure. The rest is muscle-work, which I left up to Hubby.

We are getting pretty good at installing laminate. This is the fourth time we have worked with the material and have figured out a few tricks. The only thing really slowing us down is that we have to borrow most of the tools needed. We did finally splurge on our very own handsaw. That moved things along.

So now the baby’s room and hallway are pretty much complete. We just have a few patches to fill and ¼ round trim to replace. The fastest method for that is to use a nail gun – which we will have to borrow. That fact alone may slow down the completion quite a bit, but at least the bulk of the job is complete. Yippee for Hubby and all his hard work (and sore hands, knees and pinched skin).

Next weekend we plan to tackle our bedroom floor, which involves moving a lot of furniture. I also have my baby shower to attend. And Hubby has to work the same day. So hopefully we can get it all done on Saturday and then I can start concentrating on the next thing I want done. I’m not sure what that is yet, but I feel I should make it a solo project or else Hubby will want nothing more to do with me. :-p


I’m going to wear out Hubby soon. I am starting to bring him to work with me to show him the ropes so he can take over when I am too big and tired to work and while I am in recovering after having the baby.

I’ve been tiring so easy lately. Taking an afternoon nap just about every day. I don’t let myself feel guilty about it either. In several weeks, sleep will be a luxury and I know I will wish I took more advantage of napping.

(This weeks belly picture coming soon. Like when I take a picture of myself and don't look so tired - LOL)

Baby Bum

I received this free diaper sample in the mail the other day. (I did tell you I like free stuff).
While it was still in the mailer package I was sure it was baby wipes or a booklet. It was surely too small to be a diaper. Guess I was wrong. I can’t believe his bum is really going to be that small.



Funny thing is, I don't remember signing up for this freebie. I must have gone crazy on one of my googling free stuff sprees.

32 weeks...

Prenatal classes finished yesterday. We should be ready now. At least as ready as possible. Still a few things to do around the house that I'm too pregnant to do. Hopefully they will get done without too much worrying on my part.

I keep trying to tell myself that some of these things are not that important. The baby will be fine without kittens painted on the walls. As long as he has clothes and diapers and some where to sleep and of course mommy and daddy, he will do just fine.

Just trying to relax as much as my personality will allow me for the next 8 weeks or so.

Hubby will be starting to work with mom and I this week. Hopefully this will help me to not be exhausted after cleaning two houses. And once he is set up there and I can no longer get down to clean a toilet I guess I am off to wait for the baby's arrival. I'm hoping to work as long as possible. I'm not a good waiter. I want things done yesterday. :)

Which leads me to wonder...will the baby be on time? How many "first born" babies are born right on their due date? How many are late? Early? I don't think I could handle a late baby. Heck I'm usually half an hour early to my dental appointments!

My Father always Said “Nobody said life was going to be Fair!”

My response “ Well that’s not fair!”

This is the view from my kitchen window. I put up the suncatchers to distract me from what is really out there, but all the same my imagination will only take me so far.

This house has been in several stages of collapsing since I first met my hubby. Sadly, back in 2006 when I first saw it people were actually living in it. With a newborn baby. And rodents. And who knows what else. Paying rent for the privilege. The owner either doesn’t know that houses need maintenance or he doesn’t care.

Once it was vacated the yard maintenance became non-existent. I’m sure more than one person called the city about the grass growing so long they were losing their children in it. City workers came and cleaned it all up. I’m sure the owner was sent quite the hefty bill.

His solution:

Last year, his nephew had visited the neighbourhood informing us that they had planned to tear it down and rebuild two rental units further back in the yard. A group of what I assume were his friends and family showed up one day and began by removing the siding by hand. Without gloves or other safety equipment. Without a permit.

The city workers came once again to inform them that they needed a permit to dismantle the house.

Once again the house was abandoned.

The city was called again about the state of the yard. This time he hired his own people to cut it. They did a half-ass job and left. Before anyone could complain the city workers went on strike. Not before the For Sale sign went up. At first I was hopeful, but really, who is going to want it now in this state. The owner is likely asking way too much for what is only property with hefty baggage. How much would it cost just to tear down the house?

So, we are left looking at this misery every time we leave the house. Whenever service people or friends visit we hear comments about it. One service guy came over the other day and hit the nail on the head – “You’d have to pay ME to take that house!”

According to my limited research there isn’t much we can do about it except complain about the grass again. It must be terrible for our neighbourhood’s Feng shui. It’s depressing. And making matters even worse, it seems that people have now mistaken it for the new city dump. More and more junk is tossed into the back yard.

It’s not fair!

And yet another appointment

We saw the OB/GYN today for my regular monthly visit (which has turned into my regular every two week visit as of my next appointment).

I have not gained any weight. In fact I think I lost a pound. How is that possible? My belly is getting bigger, but I'm not gaining. Does this mean I can have that extra serving of chocolate ice cream? Or some large fries (no sharing with hubby this time)?

I was reassured by my doctor that considering my starting weight and early pregnancy weight gain we are doing fine. She measured my belly and baby is growing. She might send me for a scan next time just to be sure.

And though I would love another peek at my little man, I know I am going to be so sick and tired of appointments. Or rather waiting rooms!

31 weeks pregnant

31 weeks pregnant
Originally uploaded by lovey_dovey9

Not much bigger than last week, but I suspect the next two months will bring more growth.
I am getting really excited. I can't wait to cuddle with my little guy.

Prenatal Class

We went to our first prenatal class today. We decided to take the daylong, two-session class because the other option was to go Wednesday nights at 8pm for 4 sessions. Well, the way I’ve been lately, by 8pm I’m ready to go to bed or in the very least curl up on the couch and zone out.

I was a bit apprehensive about class this week. It was just my social anxiety creeping up on me. I managed well. The teacher is likeable and easy going. The other couples in the class seem cool too.

We covered a lot in one day. Watched a couple of birthing videos, which I admit make me a bit squirmy in my seat. But I think when it comes down to it when I’m going through it I will be fine. It’s kind of like pulling a sliver from someone else’s finger grosses me out. However, if it’s my own sliver and finger – rip away.

I know childbirth shouldn’t be so easily compared to a sliver; I’m just trying to get across how my squeamishness (is that a real word?) works.

Hubby was quite interested and involved in a lot of the discussions, which I really appreciate. I know when we comes down to it I will be too busy concentrating on my own pain to really know what is happening or even what I should be doing. I’m confident he will be a good coach.

At the end of class we toured the birthing unit of the hospital. Sadly, they were too busy to show us any of the babies in the nursery. I feel a bit more relief now having more of an idea of what will happen and where.

We have another session next week in which we will be covering breastfeeding and formula feeding, bathing a newborn and other such topics, which sound a lot more enjoyable than labour and delivery.

Maybe I Have Too Much Time On My Hands...

It has been bugging me for a little while that my blog's web address did not match my blog's name. Maybe I'm just too anal retentive. Maybe these pregnancy hormones have made me slightly crazy. Who knows?! LOL

So now I have changed it. Love Doodle Muffin...a little more original than Cat's Eyes, but still relating to cats. (Love Muffin and Doodle Muffin are one of my cat's various nicknames). Also the Cat part of Cat's Eyes referred to my initials. Since marrying and taking my hubby's name I no longer have the cool initials anymore. It was the hardest part of changing my name :(

So now I stare at the header of my blog realizing that my cool banner needs changing too. I think I'm just coming up with make work projects for myself. Things to keep me occupied for the next ten weeks!!

30 Weeks

Did I ever mention I love free stuff? I think my mom turned me onto free offers when I was a kid. She would collect the cereal box tops and send them in for what ever little gadget was on offer. Fun! Now that I am older I appreciate this even more. Getting mail that isn't a bill is always great news.

So when I first found out I was pregnant I searched out for websites with free information. Was I ever surprised when I had to sift through thousands of sites to settle on a few that were to my liking. In the process I found Nestle Baby...Not only did I find information, but a free offer for expectant moms. My package arrived a couple of days ago. I had almost forgotten about it.

This is the stuff I got :


Although I do plan on breast feeding I think it might be a good idea to have a back up plan. And I cannot resist free stuff :) Also, if I don't end up using the formula I will donate it to the food bank. It doesn't expire until over a year after my baby is due.

At 30 weeks pregnant the discomforts are really starting to kick in (so to speak). Trying to get comfortable and stay comfortable in bed is nearly impossible. When I do finally find a position I am forced to get up and visit the bathroom. The little guy's kicks and punches are stronger now. I feel like my whole being is vibrating from him sometimes.

My left foot is permanently swollen to different degrees during the day. I can no longer wear my sandals. The strap just won't go around my ankle. My right foot is fine. Maybe slightly swollen, but compared to the left it looks normal. Go figure!

Acid reflux and heartburn persist even with my continued use of TUMS.

With ten weeks (approx.) to go, will I miss being pregnant? I think I will. Knowing exactly where my little guy is. His reassure kicks and nudges telling me everything's alright. My protruding belly, which the site of seems to make people smile. (Luckily, no one has tried to touch it!) I think it looks cute and I'm enjoying it, even if it gives me that "plumber-look" in certain outfits.

My greatest frustration seems to be that I can't/shouldn't do certain things that my control-freak side needs to do.

These past few days we moved the computers from what will be the baby's room to the basement. Or rather Hubby moved them, I supervised and carried the light stuff. And just doing that was exhausting. It has taken me three days to sort everything out that I would have normally had done right away.

The crib will eventually go against this wall:


Thankfully it is almost done. Hubby did a wonderful job allowing me to boss him around (joke! Sort of...) and he moved the heavy stuff without help and only one bruised knee.

Working on the computer down here almost feels like we've gone back in time to when we first moved in together and lived in the basement. I am so glad we aren't confined to this area anymore. Its too dark for everyday living for me. However, I am glad that we are able to expand on our living space so that the baby can have his own space - even though I am sure he will remain within arms reach of mommy for the first little while.

In My Very Own Driveway

So I’ve been crying for no reason at all lately. Little things are setting me off. Work has been slow. And waiting for cable techs and eaves trough quotes has kept us kind of trapped at the house waiting. Not good for my mood. So I decided to go for a walk this morning to the library.

Our local library sucks. Guess I’m used to the huge central branch in Richmond Hill. Not this little one in Scarborough. So the movie selection sucked. I did borrow a pregnancy yoga DVD.

And I borrowed some books on blogging. Yes, even after these couple of years of my blogging efforts I still feel like a newbie. Hell! There’s always something new to learn.

So I start walking home and I can see the neighbours in my driveway (we share the driveway with one of the neighbours) and they look like they are waiting for me. I wonder what is up. We usually keep to ourselves not saying much more than hello! He did mow our lawn the other day, did hubby not thank him yet?

“How’s your day going?”

“Um, fine!”

“Guess you didn’t see this then?” He points to our cars. His windshield is smashed and my rear window is completely obliterated. My jaw just dropped.

“Oh my god! When did this happen? Did anyone see who did it?”

The neighbour said he discovered it at six this morning as he was preparing to go to work. None of the neighbours heard or saw anything. We all suspect it was kids probably with a baseball bat. The damage to the neighbours windshield seems to fit this theory. I can’t believe that I didn’t see it on my way out. Pregnancy brain or maybe I just wasn’t looking for it.

So I get in the house call for hubby and tell him what happened. I run to check my insurance policy for my coverage. Hubby and the neighbour discuss what they would like to do to the person who did this outside as I slowly breakdown inside the house.

Confused, I think that deductible is what the insurance company will cover before I have to pay out. Of course I find out I am wrong about that after talking to my insurance agent, wondering in my pregnancy hazed brain why they are so willing to let me go on my own and have it taken care of and they will reimburse me later – minus the deductible. Fuuuuuuuudge!

So I find a low quote, less than the deductible. Call back the insurance agent and leave a message telling them so. However, according to my mother-in-law, since I told the insurance company what happened my insurance will likely go up. Even though they were no help what so ever!!

In the words of hubby, “What the F*** do we pay for insurance for if they won’t even cover this? It’s not like WE are at fault.”

I did file a police report- my first ever. Surprisingly, they didn’t come in person. Everything was done on the phone. I was a bit disappointed. They asked if this has happened before. NO. Have there have been any incidence with the neighbours recently. NO. Sadly, because we have no suspects it is likely that the a—hole(s) that did this will not be caught.

I have my suspicions. And they make me sound like the crazy old cat lady I always thought I’d become. It’s kids that did it! Summer vacation is just too long. They’re bored already and trying to create some excitement for themselves.

I’ve heard talk that the city wants to impose a curfew for minors. Especially after this incident I am all for it. How about they also consider shorter school breaks? I believe that is what they do in some European countries - a quick two week summer holiday then back to school! (I’ll have to look that up).

I know the “it’s the kids” theory is just my suspicion, but really with no enemies and nothing stolen who else would do such a senseless act of destruction?

After taking the car to the shop to have the window replaced and helping hubby clean up the driveway. Then calling my therapist (my mom). The day had disappeared and all my energy was sapped. I am surprised I managed dinner.

I did shed a few tears of frustration, but I am trying not to stress too much about the whole thing. What’s done is done, right? Now only good things can happen!!! Damn it!! Good things!

29 Weeks – Oh my! We are so close!

I am feeling big now. Though thankfully people keep telling me I look small and good for 7 months pregnant. I just wish that good feeling would carry over to my comfort level. I just cannot find a comfortable position no matter how I sit or lie down.

The other night as I tried to fall to sleep I had to pee constantly. I would roll to one side, the little guy would start kicking my bladder then I would have to go pee. Like 3 times in one hour! Must have been his position.

I have been noticing more gray hairs, just the odd one here or there. A new one at least once every week or so. He’s not even born yet and already giving me grays!

My moods have been crazy. I’ve been getting upset for little stupid things. “Oh my god the house needs to be vacuumed again.” “Why are there dirty dishes in the sink?” “Why isn’t hubby paying attention to me?” “Why is hubby paying so much attention to me – its annoying!” - You know, stuff like that. Luckily, my hubby really loves me and tries hard to deal with me when I get like this. Sometimes he’s at a loss though. For my part I must remember that my hormones are everywhere and I must calm down and just enjoy the ride.

I went to the dentist yesterday for a “prenatal cleaning”. Pregnancy gingivitis is bad, but it feels good to have clean teeth. I really like the hygienist that takes care of me. We have a good time talking (when I don’t have a bunch of tools in my mouth). Especially now that I’m pregnant we can talk about babies.

At one point though I felt a wave of faintness and nausea. I don’t know if it was the stuffy room and humidity, lying on my back for so long, a need for more food or all of the above. I didn’t think I would make it. I found myself trying to fight it and that only made it worse. She gave me some water and used the air sprayer tool on me. I turned on my side and the wave passed. Thank God! So embarrassing! She joked with me that I was just milking the whole pregnancy thing – HAHA!

After that I went for a much needed haircut (after eating of course). I have my bangs back! Whenever my hair grows out and I’m too lazy to get a trim I contemplate just letting the bangs go. Once I do cut them again I realize how much I like them. Just wish my hair wasn’t growing so fast. This might be my last hair cut before baby is born.




Prenatal classes start on the 22nd. We’re hoping to get through them with out any social anxiety. It’s for the baby so we’ll be strong!

Eleven more weeks and then our lives will be turned upside down with a bundle of love.

Sugar, Sugar

I had my glucose tolerance test done today. The drink they gave me wasn't as gross as I thought it would be. I had imagined a super sweet chalky medicine-like concoction. What I got looked and tasted like orange pop. With a medicine-like after taste.

Anyway, I was told to drink up and tell the tech as soon as I finished. Then I had to wait for an hour. So hubby and I started to leave... "Mame you can't leave." Great! We thought a walk would help time to pass. And I wouldn't have to think about being hungry (I was fasting for the test) or how I missed my morning coffee (I do allow myself one a day!!)

So instead we were stuck in the waiting room with a bunch of strangers and I swear to God that chair is used as a torture devise. I couldn't lean back into it because the top of the back felt like a razor digging into my shoulder blades. I was having a hard time sitting up straight or leaning forward. With my big belly in the way, and that orange pop stuff the only thing in my system I was uncomfortable and I kept burping. Hubby was a trooper for putting up with me.

Finally I was called into the room so the lady could take my blood. I've had so many blood tests done in my life it does not make me nervous any more. What does make me uncomfortable is when the tech has the needle in my arm and then says "Oops". I managed not to comment and only felt slight discomfort. I didn't want to make her nervous (or more nervous - I think she might have been new). Lucky, (for me or possibly her) I did not leave with a bruised arm.

Who's Pregnancy Is This Anyway? 28 Weeks

Seems hubby is trying to steal my thunder. He's having midnight cravings. And leg cramps. I guess as long as he doesn't get a belly (or moody like me)I should be happy.

I discovered a wonderful tool on my photo editing software today. Actually two wonderful tools. The first is the blemish remover. No more red spots for me. Who needs make-up? The second is the toothbrush tool. A whiter smile with a click of a button. No chemicals. No payments. Just a gorgeous grin. I like.

I am still trying to utilize my "normal" clothes when I can. Not sure if this tank is working though. I've got the peek-a-boo belly happening. Can I get away with it? Or do I just look like I'm trying not to buy new clothes?

I did suffer an embarrassing moment yesterday wearing these shorts. Seems now that my hips are smaller than my belly the drawstring needs some fine tuning - constantly.

Hubby and I went for a walk at the Beaches. As I was waddling across a street to catch up I started to lose my shorts. I mean they were practically off. Below the bum cheeks. Luckily, I was wearing a long, baggy maternity top to cover up my undies but I'm sure the guy driving by had a nice chuckle at my expense. Heck, once I refastened myself and tugged on the shorts a few times to make sure they were staying put, I had a good chuckle too.

Was this Chair ever comfortable?

As baby and I grow bigger I am finding it extremely difficult to get comfortable. As this creative spurt of mine has my mind whirling, I want to sit at my computer and read blogs. Check out some photography tutorials. Write a bit. Edit some pictures. But I can't seem to sit here for very long before I become extremely uncomfortable. Never mind the heat. I have the A/C running as I sit here in t-shirt and boxers with sweat running down my face. Oh the joys of pregnancy. At least the little guy is keeping me company with his little kicks and punches.

Of course Chichi can get comfy anywhere. I envy her.



We went for my prenatal check up yesterday. The doctor measured my belly and checked the little one's heart beat. He's growing well :) I only gained 3Lbs since my last visit. One pound more than what you're "supposed" to gain on "average"... I do worry about it. It's a crazy phenomenon my mom likes to call "having access to too much information!" Anyway, doc never mentions my weight so I shouldn't worry. Of course I won't start a diet of ice cream sundaes either.

I mentioned my puffy ankle and she checked my blood pressure. That is fine, so it could be the humidity. It could also be too much salt in my diet. For that I am probably guilty. Sweets I can usually walk away from. Salty food on the other hand I cannot resist!! She also suggested I rest with my feet elevated. Otherwise, its a normal pregnancy symptom.

So then I mentioned my moodiness. The doctor just told me to blame hubby. Then she made sure we knew she was joking. But once again just another pregnancy normalcy. And she told hubby to not take it personal. I liked the blame it on him advice better though.

I forgot to mention my light-headedness, which seems to have passed now anyway. But the "pregnancy brain" is kicking in big time. I HAVE to write lists now just to keep my life in order. Then I HAVE to remember to read the lists!

Counting Down...

As excited as I am to finally experience motherhood and to meet our little bundle of joy, I have realized that I have been avoiding my education in the actually process of labour and delivery. Part of my mind is telling me I can wait to learn it at the prenatal classes we signed up for. Part of my mind says we'll just wing it. And part of my mind is guilty for avoiding the topic for so long.

I have been happy to read about the baby's development week-by-week, though truth be told I'm getting bored and just want to get to the good stuff (you know, the cuddling and cooing and such). But when I start to read about labour and delivery (unless written in a humorous manner) my eyes gloss over and I start thinking if I have enough Peanut butter for a batch of cookies.

I am also set in my ways and don't want to read about anything I haven't already set my mind on. Even though I know I must keep an open mind, I don't want to hear about how I should have natural childbirth. No pain relief! Are you insane? At least my doctor agrees with me. She said "Natural childbirth does not make any one a better mother. For your first child I would recommend an epidural."

But as you can tell it is obviously on my mind, as much as I try to avoid the topic. And its not like I have no resources. I have the world wide web. And books galore. Now to just get down to it and stop daydreaming that it will be like on TV.

My goal for today is to read at least one article or chapter about labour and delivery. But first I have laundry and work. Oh and about those cookies...

27 Weeks

roundwithtree
Originally uploaded by lovey_dovey9

Shortness of breath. Acid reflux. Puffy foot (it's still just the left one). And now I'm light headed. With just 13 weeks left I'm looking forward to meeting my little guy.

I had a dream the other night that he was born a week earlier than expected. I was changing his diaper.

Hubby took this picture of me at the park yesterday. I like how the tree cradles my roundness. :)

week 26 (or 14 weeks left)

It's hard to believe we are almost done, or rather he's almost done. Almost 7 months and into the third trimester (depending on which source I check). I think I've felt a hand or a foot in my belly on a couple of occasions. Heartburn has kicked in. Not as bad as I have had it, but it's consistent.

We picked up our first baby present on Thursday. A Graco Deluxe Travel system. (Its fancy terminology for stroller with infant car seat). Recommended by my sister-in-law, because she loves Graco products and she saw it on sale for us. Baba volunteered to buy it as long as we picked it up. I'm not one who can wait for much of anything (maybe that's why these 9 months are starting to drag for me and no one else?!). We picked it up and the next day had it out of the box and assembled. So far we haven't given the cats any rides. I'm hoping they will stay away from it. I don't need another item to vacuum cat fur off of.

Although we still have three months to prepare I'm starting to get anxious about preparing the baby's room. We still have our computers in here and the floors aren't done. And the kittens aren't on the walls. And where's the crib? (I will calm down I promise.)

25 Weeks - Things I Love (and HateDislike) about Pregnancy

What I love about being pregnant:

- feeling my baby kick, especially when I tap my belly and he taps back
- having an excuse to take midday naps
- after a midnight bathroom visit, the little one gives me a few reassuring kicks before I fall back to sleep
- shopping for baby clothes...for MY baby - not someone else's and not for my "maybe in the future..." box (most of which turned out to be girl's clothes - guess we'll have to try for another one after this little guy...)
- now that I'm showing strangers will smile at me for no reason and family members get even more excited about the baby
- watching my body change
- having a good excuse to boss people (mostly hubby) around - you don't expect me to lift/climb/exert/etc. myself do you?

What I hate dislike about being pregnant:

- acid reflux, gas, indigestion, stuffy/bloody nose and swollen ankles. Or should I say ankle - it only seems to effect my left one!?
- having to nap in the midday - I feel guilty
- waking up multiple times in the night to pee
- frustration about what baby stuff I should buy/ask for. Is a baby wipes warmer really necessary?
- it hasn't happened to me yet, but I fear strangers touching my belly without permission. Not that I would give them permission even if asked!
- fearing my body won't change back after giving birth (not that I expect an instant change)
- not being able to do somethings for myself. I want it done now and I want it done my way!

But in the end I AM really happy about being pregnant. It is amazing and wonderful to be growing another human being inside me. Sometimes it feels like science fiction. Sometimes it feels like something divine.

Budda Belly (week 24)

We are getting bigger. Hubby likes to rub my belly like I'm a Budda :) Hey if it brings us good fortune then keep rubbing...LOL

I haven't noticed any stretch marks yet (thank God!). But my belly is getting very itchy. My belly button has changed colour and looks dirty (or chocolaty). And I've been getting heartburn. Even if I just drink a glass of water!!

My mother-in-law clipped a small article about watermelon for me. It says that it is good for pregnant women. It contains B vitamins, which are good for baby's brain development. It contains folate which helps prevent birth defects like spina bifida. And though my diet and prenatal vitamin likely cover my needs in these areas I just had to have watermelon. A guilt free snack that is very thrist quenching on these warm summer days.

I continue to have small anxiety attacks about nothing in particular. I try not to take out my moodiness on innocent citizens, even if it feels good;)

I have been keeping up with my prenatal cardio workout, even though I'm sometimes bored. But it does feel good once I'm done. And with this city strike still on our local pool is closed. Bad timing! The water would feel great right now!

Hubby and I went to the Beaches on the weekend. I walked barefoot in the sand. I wore my sandals for some silly reason and found it hard to walk with them on. I managed to avoid any broken glass. The next day I could really feel the work out in my calves. Next time I will wear running shoes and hopefully the walk will be easier!!

I find it hard to believe we only have about 16 weeks left until we meet the little man. Part of me does want it to slow down. His little kicks are comforting. I know he's safe and comfortable in my belly. But then again it will be wonderful to see him. And to have my body back!!

23 weeks ALREADY!!!

I finally have a noticeable bump. My parents and Baba were very excited about this when I visited on the weekend. I'm still trying to figure out if I would say I am 5 months or 6. It seems to vary from each resource I check. The way I figure it I have 4 months to go - so I'm 5 months in. Does it really matter? ;)

(Sorry no pic this week. I forgot my camera in Richmond Hill!)

We saw the doctor yesterday. The little guy is doing great. I'm doing great. When I was weighed (I'll leave the details out on that, but I think I'm doing fine in that department - the actually number is just scary) my husband felt compelled to weigh himself. This made the doctor laugh. I'm about the same weight as he is now, even though I have stopped wearing his clothes (I am rounder after all).

Yesterday I looked at my feet and didn't recognize them. They were so swollen. I'm not good at sitting down and taking it easy sometimes. So I forced myself to sit with my feet elevated and everything looks normal again today.

I've been feeling a lot of stretching in the abs. I mentioned this to the doctor and she says its normal. It is just very uncomfortable when I am trying to get back to sleep at 2am!!

Three more weeks and I am officially in the third trimester. I cannot believe how fast time is going by. I am trying to enjoy every minute of it.

I guess our next big step before the big arrival is setting up the baby's room. New flooring. My mother-in-law is going to paint kitties on the walls (we can never have enough!!) And of course cleaning like a mad woman :)

A Different Topic

Happy Birthday to my big brother!!!!

We have to stop getting older. It's starting to scare mom!

I hope you have a wonderful day.

See you soon!

22 Weeks

Now that I am over the half way mark this baby is starting to really "kick" into my reality. I'm going to be somebody's mommy! My world as I know it will change forever. It's kind of terrifying - in a good way of course :)

I feel him kick everyday now. The little thumps are becoming more pronounced every week. I've heard that some women miss this after giving birth. I think I might too! It's comforting. When I feel him kick I know he's doing alright.

The baby shower last Sunday was nice. My 20 month old niece thought all the gifts with Elmo on them were for her. The games we played weren't too silly. And it was nice catching up with some people that I don't see too often. Of course, no one would believe that I am into my fifth month. Not every woman gets a big bump right away!!!

One week seemed to make a difference. To me at least. This is at 22 weeks. I'm wearing a non-maternity top that used to fit in a flowing manner, but now is almost getting a bit snug.


I am really starting to feel my belly stretching. And my belly button is starting to stick out. Minor discomfort there. I am really enjoying touching my own belly and am super thrilled when the baby kicks and I feel him inside and out.




I am really starting to think of labour and having the baby at home. Trying not to let my anxiety get the better of me. I'm not the only one to ever have a baby - I'm sure I'll do fine.

Next week, we go to the doctor. Again. These appointments really sneak up on me. June is almost over - already????? From what I understand I am going to be tested for gestational diabetes in the next couple of weeks. Really not looking forward to this. I'm not sure I'll be able to get down the super sweet drink I must have. Well, at least I sort of know what to expect.

Every Where I Look

I see pregnant women every where. I'm not sure if I'm just more aware because I'm part of the club. Or if 2009 is just a good fertile year. Or all the pregnant celebrities are having an influence (the last reason is admittedly a sad reason to be pregnant).

Today I am going to my husband's second cousin's baby shower. She is also having a boy. She's due in July. Though admittedly I feel awkward at social functions and I find some of these shower games really silly, I am looking forward to what gifts she gets so I can take mental notes for my own baby registry. I am also interested in comparing bumps. Will my bump be the same size at 8 months?

In our neighbourhood my husband and I are the more anti-social types. We say Hi and wave and that's about all. When we first learned we were expecting my hubby got more talkative and shared the news with a couple of the neighbours (the family that helps us take care of the outdoor cats). Now I feel every time I step outside they are checking out my belly, which at five months isn't all that big. I feel a bit uncomfortable, but at least they aren't groping at it - yet!

The neighbour did come over the other day to talk cats and try and gossip with us. And she asked how far along I was. "Oh I figured you were due in November!" Ah Ha! I was right, they were eyeballing my belly! I guess it's something I will have to deal with.

I am happy that I feel my baby boy kicking at regular times during the day. More often when I'm at rest. If I'm working I don't always feel him. However, on Friday I kept feeling little thumps for a few minutes, but everytime my mom would touch my belly he would stop. He's already testing the Gramma boundaries :)

We're Half Way There!

At week 20, time seems to be moving too fast as usual. Our boy is moving around a lot. Hubby finally felt him kick yesterday. It is very exciting.

Hubby has had a cold all weekend. I'm just praying that I don't get it. I have taken it as an excuse to relax a little more myself and to allow myself to wear yoga pants all weekend - even out of the house. I've been feeling pretty tired. At first I thought maybe I was getting sick too. Oh wait - I'm pregnant! My body is going through a heck of a lot. No wonder I'm exhausted. Sometimes it takes a few minutes to sink in again :)

I am determined to do my pregnancy aerobics three times a week. It helps with some of the discomforts, like my hands and feet swelling, backpain and shortness of breath. But then the discomforts help give me excuses for not doing it - I'm tired, achy or just plain lazy.

Well, I better get in gear.